On the supernatural TV show Sapphire and Steel, there was this one shit scary story about a being with no face who lurked malevolently in every photograph. At around about the same time, the admittedly far less malevolent Pam Ayres seemed to be lurking everywhere on TV light entertainment schedules, ready to pounce and recite gently comedic poetry with a homely rustic twang - which seems at this moment to me, in its own way, equally shit scary. Many children no doubt hid behind the sofa when she was on, just like I'm hiding behind my sofa now from this collection of her verse. I found it on the book exchange table at my local supermarket and ill-advisedly decided to flick through it just as I was coming up. Sapphire! Steel! Or any medium atomic weight element! Heeeeeeeeeeeelp!
Sapphire and Steel is pretty definitive Middle England on LSD itself by the way. I can't find the whole of Assignment 4 online but here is a link to episode 2: Sapphire and Steel Assignment 4 episode 2
Watch that on acid at your own risk. But could it ever be as fucking fucked as this?: Pam Ayres meat commercial - arrrrgggghhhhhhh......